Once again, tons of tissue papers are piled in the trash can, filled with my tears. You see, I am a very emotional girl who gets deeply touched with almost everything. Show me a dead dog and I will weep like crazy. On the other hand, these days have been more emotional to me. My friend’s aunt just got coma. Visiting her with my friend made me realize what suffering looked like. No offense to my friend, but her aunt seemed quite lifeless. None of her body parts were responsive, except her head. All she can do is to make little glances and gentle moans to assure us that she’s understanding our talks.

Like me, my friend is emotional too. I know it’s really hard for her. And because I love her, I am also experiencing the same pain. God knows how poignant this can be, and I just can’t imagine what would I feel if that kind of situation struck my life. I just wish that would never happen.

Darn, even the thought of it is painful. But I realized that there are actually two things that I can call real suffering:

Losing someone you love. This is a living hell. You’d wish that it was you who’s dead, not the person you hold dearly. Nothing is as painful as staying alive without him/her by your side. Some people say that it’s okay because that person lingers in our soul. And I say that it’s nothing but a screwed up cliché to help us escape the fact that we lose something important that we will never gain.

Comatose. Clearly, my visit on my friend’s aunt influenced me on my perception about suffering. It’s a physical, psychological, mental, and emotional torture that affects both of the sick and his/her loved ones. If you had this, you’d wish you’re dead, because living in a world of corners, hospital machineries, and dextrose is a screwed up existence worse than hell. Furthermore, what would make you more hurt is seeing your loved one suffer because you are bed-ridden and idle, just waiting for Jack the Reaper to fetch you.

Love, I suppose, is the most valuable issue in one’s life. Even before we are born, love has already been shown as our parents has established it as the foundation of their relationship. But then again, love is not just about marriage and relationship with the opposite sex. There is definitely more to love than that. In fact, love is classified into several types. And let me share three of them:

Agape Love – The very core of love. It is a divine emotion bestowed by the Almighty Father. Agape love is more commonly called as “religious love.” This is the devotion that we show to faith and religion, the worship and the loyalty that we express for our Creator.

Familial Love - How we value our family, friends, neighbors, acquaintances, colleagues, etc. is called Familial love. This is the foundation of our bonds with the people we are close with.

Eros Love – I guess this kind of love is one of the things that intrigues us. Eros is the god of love in Greek mythology, and his name is used to defy romantic love or love for the opposite sex. This is the very reason on how we get deeply attached to our partner.

There are still some things that we don’t know about love. It can be its kind, psychology, or definition. However, I don’t think vast knowledge of love is that crucial (though it helps us to understand what it means), as long as you feel the very essence of it.

It’s always been rewarding to see the person you love happy from appreciating what you’re doing for him/her. It can be doing him/her a favor or giving gifts. And speaking of which, it can be more pleasant once the gift is presented in a surprising way. He/she will love it more because he/she is not expecting anything from you.

People who do this always leave their loved one teary-eyed because of the thought of giving them something in a special way.

Since it’s surprise that we are talking about, there are lots of techniques on how to do it:

When there is an occasion, especially if it’s birthday, pretend that you don’t have anything special to do, that it will be like an ordinary get-together with your friends and family.

Pull a crazy and silly stunt then give your gift after revealing your little acts (or if he/she notices that what your stuff is just an act). This is a very effective one, since your loved one’s mindset is focused on the stunt your pulling. It can be a practical joke, a “scary tactic,” a fight within your group, etc. Then when you notice that he/she is overwhelmed with the situation, reveal your true purpose of your act. No matter how upset, scared, or worried your loved one might be, he/she will certainly appreciate it.

One of the best way to show your loved one how much he/she means to you is to give him/her a gift in an ordinary day. When it is anniversary, birthday, or Christmas, your special one might be expecting a gift, thus it lessens the essence of surprise. On the other hand, when you give something without any occasion, then he/she will feel very happy on that. Remember gifts are way of saying I love you or thank you to that person, so make sure that you are giving something that expresses it. And with a dab of surprise, he/she will surely feel more joyful.